Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Things Worth Doing

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I wrote about running yesterday which always makes me cringe just a little.  I have been running for 19 years.  I have done several races including a 1/2 and full marathon.  I am currently running between 4 and 6 miles at least 6 days a week.  All that being said...I am not a very good runner.  In all that time and miles I have yet to get faster or better at it....see...not exactly the usual outcome of 18 years of doing something.

But the other day while I was somewhat grumbling while getting my running clothes together I had a thought...Anything worth doing is worth doing it badly...then I realized that may not have been my thought alone...thank you Chesterton.

But it so perfectly fit my thoughts it felt like my own.  So what I am not good at it..? even the days when I feel like an elephant pounding the ground makes me feel better in many many ways.  And when I do get blessed with a run that I feel like I may actually have done this before I know what a gift that is .  Either way..I will not stop just because I am not that good at it, no matter how long I work at it!



Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Running With My Rosary

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Two weekends ago I could not find my headphones before running.  Not having that much time I decided to just hurry up and run ...without ear buds, which is not at all what I usually do.

As I was running I decided I would pray a Rosary.  Why not?  I had plenty of time and it was raining pretty steady so I did not think people who passed me could see my mouth moving.

My history with the rosary is typical.  I pray it as often as I can, but not nearly as much as I should.  Getting distracted, and dare I say sleepy, seems to be a devotion of it's own for me when I am praying it.

But on this day I was not in danger of falling asleep and I was VERY focused.  It felt like a long over due conversation I was having.  I would say the mystery and then give a little chit chat along with it.  After running out of things to say I would say my Hail Mary's.  My mind would wonder after each mystery...but it would be drawn right back.  This felt like true prayer for me.

How can that be?  I am not on my knees.  I am not in adoration?  I am not journaling in an adorable journal with a super cute pen.  How can this be prayer?

If prayer is supposed to connect and elevate your heart and mind to God then that is exactly what it did that day.  And the whole time I am running I am realizing that of course I can pray better like this.  This is how He made me...busy and constantly moving, full of thoughts but often short on time.  He is always there.  Always where I am.  Running is no different.

Since that day I have lost my ear buds several times.  At first I blamed Emily...she must be taking them.  But no, she wasn't.  I keep putting them in random places.  Now all I can think is God kinda liked our chit chat too!!

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Sunday Evening Post

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If the sun is shining..the kids ask to play in the hose.  It is still 45 degrees but shorts are on and flip flops are found.  We get 2 days of sun and life feels so ...easy!

This week is mixed with mostly rain and the hope of sun next weekend...

It is amazing how much weather effects your outlook here...


Friday, April 24, 2015

Friday Things That Make Me Smile

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This week...

I had 2 moms show up for Rosary group.  THAT. FELT. GREAT.

I celebrated St. George's feast day with a cake and some Playmobil dragons.

I cried a few days in a row.

I finished Brideshead Revisited and LOVED it.  It took a little bit to get into...but now it won't leave my brain.

I also finished Brain on Fire...which was a little slow going for me.  My friend LOVED it...but after reading Still Alice I just get terrified over what can happen to me.

I am now going to read a really pretty copy of Emma.  Reading pretty books makes it more fun.

Jack had his first game on Tuesday in Minors for Little League, Lucy has her first game Friday night.  Drew was such a good boy this week and I was ever so happy that he saw the play with us last week.  It just feels official that we are a family of 8...he was not left home with a babysitter.  It was a big night for us.

We watched the movie Big Eyes on Sunday night and it was really good....people have crazy stories.

My mom and dad are visiting soon and I am so excited about seeing them...it has been way to long.

The sun came out and is supposed to stay for 3 days...Life. Is. Good.


Thursday, April 23, 2015

FINDING WHAT GOD WANTS



saying YES

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The other day I was talking with my mom and told her something I had been praying about.  She said to me, "Maybe you should ask for a sign..a specific direction that confirms what you are asking."

And I immediately told her..."I did that mom, and He sent me a very specific sign, but I am not sure the sign He sent me was the answer I wanted....so I am waiting for another one."

Not exactly fair play.  Please God answer my prayer, as long as it is the answer I want it to be, otherwise I will wait and do nothing???

Now I need the grace to say Yes when I know He has put something on my heart.

Small steps...

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Yesterday was kind of a crummy day.  I let it get the best of me and it was SO tiring.  It is very exhausting being mad all day...not a super great use of time.  But last night, after we all were back together I was restored and refreshed.  My little eye-roller felt just as crummy as I did and we made even more progress in the whole "this is life" category.  I have to remember that sometimes the crummy days are sometimes more fruitful than the GLORIOUS ones...

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Did Zlie Martin Ever Get MAD at her saintly daughter??

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I know St. Theresa was not a saint when she was a child.  I realize through God's grace and her obedience she gave her whole life to our Lord...and became a saint after much trial and suffering.

But this morning as I sit here STEAMING mad at a few people I live with I have to wonder if Saints moms ever got STEAMING mad...

Did Zlie Martin ever have St. Theresa roll her eyes at her and Zlie loose it...It's not unthinkable to imagine a teenager getting snippy with any mother, right?  Even if that mother was NOT in the least deserving....

I can take eye rolling, sometimes...ignore it, and after much work I can even sometimes laugh at the ridiculous reaction....but every now and again I get so MAD at the whole ordeal..  

And the Catholic me is at war with the angry me....

"Peace and patience"....NO!!  I'm too mad.

"Mercy and forgiveness".......NO!! I'm too MAD.

"Be a good example and don't do the mother equivalent to eye rolling"...NO!!  I'm too MAD.


I would like to have that catholic part of me come out quicker when I am getting frustrated but unfortunately the MAD part has no problem RUSHING to the surface.

And without Zlie would there have been a St. Theresa?

Did St. Theresa roll her eyes?

Did her mother react?




Tuesday, April 21, 2015

"What Do You Want Today Lord"


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When He has you in a certain place at a certain time and you are not sure of the reason, the best thing I have found to do is just pray, "What do you want today Lord"....

Sometimes I can't look much further than today.  I want to know the answer and reason for everything right here, right now.  But when I say the simple prayer, "what do you want today Lord," I try and remember to stay in the here and now.

When the rain has not stopped since Easter Sunday..I have to stay in the moment.....

When the play is over and my busy little girl wants to know what is next...I have to stay in the moment...

When we begin to talk about the next move, 1 year from now, I have to stay in the moment....

When I feel the pull to homeschool on my heart but am afraid of the challenges it would bring in this location, I have to stay in the moment...

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid"
John 14:27


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