Monday, January 12, 2015
The Game Has Changed
These pictures were all taken in September 2014. The fall was really pretty here this year, sunnier than the summer. Pete's family came for a visit and it was very fun. But this fall was probably one of the most intense seasons of our marriage, which by the way, is in it's 18th year.
Starting school was very intense for my older girls and there was a lot going on there...which makes a mama weary and heart sick. It is all part of their story, but the day to day management can make you want to hit the fast forward button...just for a moment, just to see that it will all really be ok.
But the most intense, the very most saddest thing that has happened to Pete or I was the death of Pete's dad. With a terminal diagnosis in October, to his death a few days after Christmas made this passed few months sadder than I would have ever thought possible.
To say I loved Pete's dad feels to small to describe how I felt about him. The first moment I met him I knew I wanted to gain his favor...and I did whatever I could to make him love me...which was not hard because he loved everybody. He was amazing and my heart has a hole that will never be filled. My sadness does not even seem to be enough....
Pete and I both got to Florida, by the grace of God, to see dad before he died. We were surrounded by family and it was most wonderful. I was told, more than one time that they all wanted me to get back to blogging. They missed seeing us!
Where has my heart for blogging gone? So much has changed since I started this little place and sometimes the ability to reflect over it through my words and pictures makes me ..sad. I miss the places I have been and the times I spent with so many wonderful people. Seeing it here makes it hard sometimes.
But that is not the best place for me to leave it. Seeing the beauty of my life through picture has always helped me love the good times with the hard ones. I can't blame the gray light in Sitka...I have to find the light that is there even when I can't see it.
Trust me, I still write blog posts in my head and I do have a lot rattling around....I hope I can find the rhythm to come back more often.