Sunday, May 19, 2013

What To Do??

My mind has been racing these last few weeks.  We have been busy in a way that I never imagined.  I kinda really dig it.  I like the challenge and the adventure.  Not always the crashes that come along side this type of adventure...but what a ride.

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 We spent some time in Mobile with friends that we miss in a big way.  When I am with them I am convicted in a BIG way ...I want to be a better Catholic just by being in the presence of these moms!! They. Are . The. Best..and they make me want to be the best.  How lucky am I??

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DSC_0025 - Copy wanna hear the truth?? My mind and heart have been opening up more and more to home schooling again.  Slowly my mind and heart are thinking about giving it another go.  When I was in Mobile I spent time with these amazing young catholic girls and I was reminded of the beautiful product home schooling produces.  I want back in....

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Here is the girls do NOT.  They do not want to go back to "not being part of school" and all the fun things school has meant for them.  Try as I might, I can't help but take this reaction personal.  I will say that the schools the kids went to were AMAZING schools.  They were not Catholic...but they were REALLY good.  Great families and very amazing teachers. We all loved it!!

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For the first few days when the Holy Spirit started whispering I just hushed it....then I stopped and said.."Really...Lord..are you serious??  Is this me or You??"  Still not sure.  But I started texting friends and making phone calls.  The girls got wind and started their own campaign....TO NOT HOMESCHOOL...

I asked Emily to try and pray about it.  I know at this moment she feels like she does not want to but I asked her to ask God what the right thing for her is.  I don't know if Emily prays on her own yet.  But maybe she needs a good reason.  And for Molly...she still follows Emily's lead.  But come to think of it...I should set Molly to praying for both Emily and I to know what is right and then maybe Molly will help us decide.

;DSC_0019 I need to pray.  We all need to be on board...or at least I need to feel strongly enough that I can keep it together.  I know the challenges and being where we are will really present some challenges.




The big picture....that is what I need to keep in mind.....My story over this whole wonderfully crazy life God has given me.

I need a prayer...I asked a friend for a prayer to help me decide and she said she would get back to me.  Then today...PENTACOST...I knew...the Holy Spirit prayer...OF COURSE!!!






I like to be inspired.  I was inspired by amazing women the first time I home schooled.  And then I stayed home schooling in Mobile because I was surrounded by inspiration.  And in Virginia...I had amazing people around me who did amazing things and I somehow lost my inspiration.  I blame myself.  I am the one who lost focus....maybe I should not say "blame"...but I was the one who lost my own way to be inspired.

I would do things a little different.  I would use a different curriculum.  I would be different...I think.

I thought I would be this GREAT "school" mom...but to tell the truth ...I was not.  I got mad at the girls all the time for things that they were doing in school (school work stuff).  I hated after school snack because all they wanted was junk and they would not eat their dinner.  The kids needed to PLAY OUTSIDE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD...but they had homework.  And Drew was just entering the hold me or I will cry you to death hour of the day.  And guess what..the math teacher expected me to know how to help when she was NOT ALLOWED TO BRING HOME THE TEXT BOOK!!!

Right now I don't know..but I am working on it.  Should we just start school and see if the different school will be the same place the girls hope it will be??  Should we start at home and then try for school in High School...



  1. So sorry I missed you when you were in Mobile! As for the HS, maybe you could let the big girls go and keep the others home? Maybe they would be jealous and decide to stay home. That happened with mine last year. Love, Bridget

    1. Wish we saw you guys too!!! We loved being in Mobile.... Hope to be back one day.

  2. Homeschooling was not an option when my children were growing up. However, if it had been, i would have been a homeschooler!

    I have two daughters with children of school age. The older one's children are 19, 16 and 13. 19 graduated from high school last year and was accepted into the honors program at a state college. She just completed her freshman year and has done a great job of avoiding all the "bad" things that are a part of college these days. I am so proud of her determination and character while she is surrounded by so much depravity!

    16 skipped high school completely and enrolled in a program for the exceptionally gifted. She has now completed two years of college with all A's. There were about 30 girls who started with her. Many have left because they were simply to immature to handle college at such a young age. 16 has flourished with great guidance and support from not only the college, but her family.

    13 just completed 7th grade. He is doing very well academically and his social maturity continues to increase. Mom and Dad are doing a great job.

    My other daughter has two boys in school and 2 who are younger. Although she really wanted to homeschool her boys, her husband and his family are very opposed to it. 10 is just about to complete 4th grade. Although he is in the full-time gifted program, he is still bored. I am amazed at the amount of homework (too often busywork) that remains to be done when he gets off the school bus at 4:45 each day. He has very little free time to just play. He is at his own or his brother's sports teams every day except Sunday. His life is school, rush to sports, get home too late to have a family dinner, do at least 1.5 hours of homework and then head for bed.

    The life for 8 is pretty much the same, except he has to practice his guitar for 30-45 minutes too. He is also not challenged, but the teacher gives him at least an hour's homework each evening.

    So what is my point? The homeschooled grandchildren are finished with school by no later than 2 p.m. They have several hours to just be kids before sports and music start. If they learn the material more quickly, mom and dad can move them along.

    My other point is that because they are not surrounded by peer pressure, the homeschooled grandchildren have a much better chance of making good choices in social situations. They develop character traits that allow them to act responsibly when they leave home.

    I know you are getting a lot of push-back from your oldest daughter. Compare the behavior and attitudes of her schooled friends to those of homeschool teens. I suspect the homeschooled kids are head and shoulders above the children who go to school!

    1. Thank you so much. I thought I would love the kids coming home and me being " just mom" ... But it was not even close to that. It was such a crazy evening and I never went to bed thinking I did a great job at being a school mom.
      Sounds like you are blessed with many grand kids !!! Thanks for sharing!!!

  3. oh goodness. i feel for you. i was convicted to pull my 2 oldest OUT of public school {a good school too} a couple yrs ago, and they fought me! I have now homeschooled for 2 yrs, and MAN do i think it would be easier had we never let them experience p.s.! but the Lord dictates, and now, at least, i am listening! i already see a huge difference in my younger 2, who have only known beign homeschooled, vs. the older 2.

  4. Thank you so much for sharing . I think it will be a challenge to pull them away from what they think they should be part of.

  5. We prayed for your family this morning. (Tuesday is the day we pray for "friends, family and benefactors" and one of the kids always remembers to include the Melnicks.) We'll keep praying!

    Homeschooling has to work for parents AND children. You have too many kids to have to do "school battle" with one or two. Focus on your home, set your rules and limits for those who school at home and who school "away". Make sure your home is a house of prayer, that the center of all the Melnicks' lives is at home.


    1. As always... Exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you. I want them to want it. But maybe God still needs a different mom for them before they want it to.

  6. We stepped away from homeschooling for 6 years and I know just what you mean. We are going to return to homeschooling for our younger ones next year but let the older ones remain in school. After we take that year with the little ones we will make decisions with our middle boys (before they begin high school) all our older boys are on a path they want to remain on so we will keep them in high school. I NEVER imagined myself returning to homeschooling, I had gotten so burned out it was like a bad word at our house, but here we are and I am so very happy about it.

    1. I have this silly "all or nothing" mindset. I need to start looking at each child as their own.. Not the little group I always put them in. Thanks for sharing your situation. Good luck .

  7. My daughter begs me to go to school a lot. She's the last and she's alone. She thinks the grass is definitely greener in the schoolyard! But she is a follower and very distractable. School would not be good for her, at least not all of her. She dances once a week --in classes for homeschoolers, a privilege she would have to give up. I will not send her. I don't see it as her choice. I tell her I have to stand before God and account for my parenting.

    Maybe your compromise is the girls go to school, but not extracurriculars so you're not running in their down time --you do family activities. Many prayers for your decision. How are you finishing this year? Will they be behind?

  8. Hi Barbara,

    I think I even think the grass is greener on the other side. When the kids went to school this last year I did not let them do anything after school that kept them out over dinner. WE were all home eating dinner together EVERY night. Emily did a play for 2 months which kept her out 1 day a week. I was not about to surrender them all day. It helped...but I did feel like time together was much harder to get to.

    The kids left school early and have been doing a little bit of math during the weekdays...reading and journal writing. Besides that we have been soaking in family time and the joy of living in small spaces together education all on its you can imagine!!

    Thanks for your prayers.