Wednesday, December 16, 2009

My Waitress Days Are Over

Finishing things is hard for me. I am realizing that follow through may not be my strong point. I should have realized this back when Pete and I were dating. He would come home from the Academy for Christmas break and I would quit whatever waitress job I had at the time. I was constantly walking out after a shift if Pete was in town and wanted to go somewhere. He, of course, was horrified. For a guy who was surrounded by structure, commitment and obligation seeing me throw obligation out the window was mystifying. Somehow he saw past all of that and had faith that I could stick with something...hopefully him.

For years my inability to see things through has been my own battle. I am someone who has the , energy, heart and desire to volunteer to run things, but finishing them is a different story. So I learned to help others, never being in charge myself. I am a great cheerleader, I just struggle with being the team captain.

The reality now is I am the team captain and I have to push myself through this "not finishing" business. This situation effects more than me now. There are five people, sometimes six, who watch every move I make and they are recording and reviewing ALL of it. If I don't finish, or even worse don't make them finish, what type of virtue am I building in them, and in me?

What virtue was I working on all those years ago when I walked out of countless waitress jobs because I wanted to have fun with my boyfriend?

That is why Homeschooling is so good for me. It makes me finish. I am SO accountable for finishing. I can't walk out. I know how I want this story to end. I want my kids to grow up close. I don't want to dread the teenage years. I want them to get a good Catholic education. I want them to be pure virtous kids who love our Catholic Faith and love Jesus. I want Jack to be a priest, Molly a Sister and do whatever God calls the rest to do. Do I ultimately have control over any of that? No!! But I know that quitting will not get me any closer to this goal.

In no way do I think Homeschooling is the magic potion for all my goals. I just know that this is the path God has put me on to best acheive these goals for these kids.

So, I am sorry Lone Star, Applebee's, Los Rancharos, Barney's, Pit Boss, Tally's Diner, Congo Craigs, Breakfast Club and countless other places that I walked out on because I did not know how to finish. And thank you Pete for believing I could finish something!
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  1. Is this Big Time Diner? It looks like it.

  2. God bless you, Lisa! Isn't wonderful to know and live out one's vocation? This is my prayer for all my children, that they will realize why God put them on this earth and then do it with passion!

    When I started homeschooling 12+ years ago, I had the same daunting notion you have--the buck stops with me! Some days I would like a little less pressure to be good with all these eyes on me, but, you are right, it does help one stay on track. If I fail, this whole ship goes down.

  3. Lisa, if it makes you feel any better, walking out after a shift and never going back was every waitresses fantasy, so thank you on behalf of all former waitresses everywhere! Wish I had the guts to do that with my one and only waitressing job. But I wouldn't consider quitting those jobs to be any negative reflection of the person you are today. Let's face it, when we're young we did impulsive things that in hindsight may not have been a great idea, but the past is the past. And I think the fact that you are raising 5 beautiful, smart, and well-behaved children is all the verification you need that you are following through every single day in the one job that matters the most. Good job- keep it up!

  4. I love reading your blog!!!!!! Remeber quiting those jobs showed Pete what really mattered to you.. him! Miss you all!